Catching up

So Summer and Fall have come and gone, (although I think it is still officially Fall) the snow has begun to fall. I have to admit the snow is very pretty to look at; it also makes it much easier to spot those squirrels and chipmunks when I am standing guard at the window. Denise loves the snow. I would probably like it more too if it didn't get stuck between the spaces in my paws. It is like 'brain freeze' on my feet and legs, burrrrrr!
I do miss the summer time. Denise used to take me hunting everyday, mostly just for small game (squirrels, chipmunks, baby turkeys). I am much quicker than Denise when it comes to hunting. She is always going the other way when I am about to pounce on a chipmunk, ugh, humans! There were a few occasions where we came across some full grown turkeys and some deer. I don't think I could ever catch a turkey, they can fly like those darn pigeons in Brooklyn. For years I tried to catch pigeons, I'd be just close enough and wouldn't you know it they would just fly off. I know I should just give up bird hunting altogether, but alas it's what I like to do. Now the deer, I know if Denise would let me go I would definitely be able to out run a deer. I am not sure what I would do after I caught up with the darn things, they are pretty big. Maybe I would just bite their ankles. I just want to put them in their place, for Mike's sake. He spends so much time all spring, summer and fall taking care of our yard, and those deer eat just about everything he plants. I hate to see Mike so broken hearted over his yard work. Personally, I think he should spend more time taking me hunting rather than working in the yard. I bet he'd let me catch some of those critters. One day, over they summer, Mike had some coworkers helping him regrade the driveway one of those knuckleheads let me out of the house. It was the best day ever! Puchard, just opened up the front door and actually encouraged me to come outside. Mike was not happy, but I sure was. I had like 5 hours of freedom. I went into the woods up onto 301; tried to cause a few accidents, it was great. Oh, the good 'ol days of summer, ah, just a distant memory now. Silly me, I decided to see if the water bowl in my pen was full and Mike locked to gate behind me, he's smarted than I think sometimes.
When fall began, Denise started back at work and our hunting days practically came to an end. We did go out every weekend, it just wasn't the same. I turned 11 back in October. I am still pretty spry and energetic, at least that is what I hear people say about me. Thanksgiving was a great. Mike and Denise invited so many people over to visit with me. It was great to see Pete and Liz, I miss living with them. Patrick was in town, I was hoping he would let me run around in the woods by myself, but it didn't happen. Cathleen was here several times; I could smell that cousin of mine, Wilson, on her clothes. I was hoping she would have brought him over to visit, I love barking at him. I heard Denise saying that Cathleen was expecting another cousin, yes, I can't wait! I hope my new cousin will be bigger than Wilson, so I can play with him/her. Kathryn and Chris came to visit me as well, I think they live at my old apartment in Brooklyn, they smell like they do. I say, that guy Chris can come visit anytime, now, he knows how to walk a dog. He let me take charge, we ran through the trail past the wood shed together, wow, that was fun! We didn't get to do any hunting, but I bet he would be a great hunting companion. Maybe next time...
So now the holiday season is upon us. I am sure we will have more visitors, I can't wait. I wonder who will take me on my next adventure.

It has been a while since I've written. It's hard to get on the internet here in the woods. I have so much to write about, snakes, frogs, cats the list goes on and on...
Maybe I should start with the 4 foot black racer snake. I was out on my lead sunning myself as usual (I know, I know sunblock, ugh, the wrinkles) when a snake came along to join me. I wouldn't have minded but I know how Mike feels about snakes. So I started barking like mad to get his attention. It worked. Mike over, saw the snake then started screaming like a girl for Patrick to come out, then he ran inside. If he had a tail, I am sure it would have been between his legs. Patrick came out to see what all the racket was about. Of course Patrick couldn't just pick the snake up and toss it into the woods. He taunted and teased it picked it up and the darn thing bit him. This is when he decided to put it back in the woods. I watched that snake climb one of the trees right at the end of the driveway, she'll be back.
I have discovered a reason to spend time in my pen. Sometimes when I am back there I can see The Baby in the window. She sits there and meows at me and I bark at her, it's a blast. But like all good times, the grown ups interfere, ugh! Mike really has no patients for me, I don't blame him, I am a real pain in the a**. The Baby does antagonize me, as I do to her:) It's really quite amusing for us. I am a little jealous of her. She gets to go out into the woods, when I have to be tied up or in my pen. (I admit I would run into traffic if they ever do let me free.) Even though the cat can run around and tease me, I did scare the crap out of her the other day. She was teasing me, just sitting where I can't reach her. I was barking away at her but then Denise pulled in the driveway and I got distracted so the cat came closer, silly girl. I turned around and chased her right up a tree! She was so scared, it was hysterical.
The pickerel frogs are delicious this time of year. Denise doesn't like it when I catch them. It was a delightful surprise to find one in the kitchen today. Usually I have to go outside to get a good frog. Apparently while I was outside The Baby was roaming freely about the house when a frog hopped in under the screen door. It probably would have hopped back out but The Baby cornered it and then chased it under the 'fridge. While Denise and Mike were out the little thing hopped out and I caught it! It is currently mushed on the kitchen floor. Denise is too grossed out to touch it. Maybe Mike will pick it up, I' done with it.
Ooo, I just hear Denise talking on the phone, I think I am going to have company today. Yeah! I hear Liz is coming up by train and Patrick is coming by with some of his students. I hope I don't need to bite any of them. Sometimes people need to be put in their place.
Enough for now, I hear Denise coming out of the shower, she gets mad when I am using the internet, blah blah blah.

I DID IT!

So, Mike put me out in the pen on Saturday, it was a beautiful day and I was more than happy to go outside. What he didn't realize was that he forgot to latch the gate ha ha ha...OK I didn't realize it right away either. I was getting bored of being out there by myself, so I tried to rattle the gate to see if I could get Mike to come out and play with me. I swear on my life that all I was doing was trying to get a little attention (that is all I ever want:) and wouldn't you know the gate just opened right up for me. (I was free!!!) So I ran up to 301, just to tell all the cars to slow down. Denise is always complaining about how fast they go, I thought I would help her out. (Oh Denise was in Brooklyn on Saturday when all of this happened). I got up there and ran around, no one listened, a few people beeped their horns, the police sounded their sirens (yes, I got the police involved!) Mike did eventually notice I was free (free, free, free, love the way that sounds). He came out and tried to give me a pup-a-roni (they are delicious). Mike also took away my water bowl (he cut off my damn water supply). I tried to get water from the stream but I was too scared, that water is fast and I am afraid to get wet, I might melt. I ran around for a bit longer. But it was getting hot and I was getting thirsty. Mike was also pissed b/c he was suppose to drive to Brooklyn to meet up with Denise. I decided I wanted to come in, but I wanted Mike to work for it, I let him win (don't let him tell you any different). I had the whole house to myself for the afternoon, it was great.
Saturday night company came! I love company. Patrick showed up around 9:30. They kept talking about how he brought the baby with him. I never saw a baby, but something didn't smell right.
On Sunday I spent most of the day enjoying the sun. When Denise and Patrick started moving his things into the back room, they were still talking about 'the baby'. I still haven't seen any baby but I have seen a calico cat walking in and out of the house. She was in my pen, she was on my rocks and under my trees. I kept trying to scare her away but she just sat there and puffed herself up. I think she was trying to look bigger and tougher than me, yeah, nice try. Today, Monday, I was inside and I saw her outside, ha, ha. I got to sit on my red couch all day. She had to stay outside in the sun and run around and chase things and do whatever she wanted, wait a minute...

Fenced In

So Mike finished the pen for me. I am not sure why he let Denise in first. She went around to 'inspect it'. She found a few spaces where she thought I could squeeze through (she's right, I could have), I'm pretty flexible. She made Mike put a couple of huge rocks near spaces under the fence. It is a pretty sturdy fence, the gates are questionable, I'll work on escaping through there. I overheard Denise saying they should put chicken wire around the bottom of the gate. (I love chicken, it's better than the new dry food they have been feeding me. That stuff gives me gas. My flatulence keeps waking me up!) I really hope they decide to move my red couch outside on warm days, that would be perfect.
There was a thunder storm the other night, it was loud. I did my best to wake up Denise and Mike. It is really hard to wake them up, I whined, I whimpered, I even tried shaking the bed with my trembling body. But they wouldn't wake up. I was trying to warn them to run for cover, you never know when the whole sky is going to come crashing down on you. So I decided to just look after myself, I kicked some of Denise's shoes out of her closet and slept in there all night.
So I noticed Mike made some purchases at Home Depot. He bought me a lawn mower, a new weed whacker and a table saw ( I can't wait to use that thing). I wonder if I can use it to trim my claws? He also bought me a couple of forsythia bushes, although he told Denise he bought them for her. I know he loves me more:)

Paraguay

So it's a rainy day here in the woods. Denise and Mike haven't done a darn thing all day. Unless you call watching baseball all day doing something. I have been very busy keeping different parts of the couch warm for them. I also spent some time keeping their bed warm. I've been on watch dog duty all day. I lie on the couch and then get up to look out the window for squirrels, deer or turkeys. You never know when these wild animals will attack, it's my job to keep Mike and Denise safe. They don't appreciate my efforts. When I am on the bed they send me to go keep the couch warm, when I'm on the couch they yell at me to go keep the bed warm. When I bark or growl to scare off those vicious squirrels, they tell me to quiet down. I know they don't understand, but I will keep up the good work.
Yesterday, they worked 'like humans', cleaning the house, the garage and Mike built a deck. Denise probably spent about two hours just vacuuming my hair off of every inch of the couch. Don't worry I have spent the better part of today getting my hairs just where I like them, embedded into the fibers of the couch. Denise gave me a bath the other night because she said I smelled worse than corn chips. I probably lost about five pounds between the hair that came off and the shivering I did the entire time I was in the bath. Denise spent about an hour cleaning up after that too, fool. If she would just leave my shedding be we'd all be happier and have more time on our paws for other things.
I hear there is a plan to build me some kind of a pen. This is Mike's idea. He wants to build something behind the house, so it can't be seen. Don't they know it'll never work, I'll hate it, I'll get out of it, I'll show them:)